New addition to the LaPlante family

For years, I have wanted a family. I am not just talking about having a wife and in-laws. I first got married at age 26, back in 1994. I really wanted children, but my then wife was resistant to the idea like an Army mule. At one time she was receptive to the concept prior to marriage, but then she went right back to the disdainful attitude she once had towards children.

I have always loved children. Little kids often cling to me and climb on me like a jungle gym. I have always loved having little cousins, nephews, and children of friends to play with. I have enjoyed having cats and dogs over the years, as well. However, it was never the same as having your own. I languished and literally wept for years over being childless. I was the only one of the five LaPlante brothers to not have children.

Almost a year and a half ago, my now ex-wife was caught in adultery and she left to live with the man with whom she was cheating. I went through Hell with that situation for various reasons I have already blogged. Three months after she left, I met and dated one woman that I really liked for about 3 weeks, but she turned out not to be as she appeared on the surface. It was a crushing blow to have just gone through a betrayal, false legal accusations, and separation; then to go through a fast moving but very odd relationship that ended abruptly. I can say with all sincerity that I was wronged in that relationship and I was hurt by this woman.

One week after that relationship suddenly ended, I met Sharon. December 3, 2007 was a day that changed my whole life. That was one year ago today. God brought an intelligent, attractive, affectionate, loyal, caring woman into my life and we clicked immediately. After knowing each other just one week, we knew in what direction we were headed with the relationship. We both wanted a family together. She wanted another child (she already had a wonderful five year old son, who was four when we met) and I wanted my first. On October 12th of this year, we married. We has prayed, talked about, and shared about wanting to start a family together as soon as we got married.

I remember when the two of us were traveling for a day trip to the beach and I asked Sharon if she was happy. She said she was very happy. I asked her what would make her happier. She answered, "Marry me." I told her that as soon as I could legally do so, I would. We still had some legal matters to which I needed to attend, such as getting my divorce finalized. I asked her, "What else?" to which she replied, "Impregnate me." I thought that was an amazing response, being most unexpected in verbiage but not sentiment. I wanted to do that very thing with all my heart.

After our wedding day, we got away for our week long honeymoon in Duck, North Carolina on the Outer Banks. We both love the OBX (as it called). I had been there more often than she had and knew the area more so than she. If memory serves correctly, she said she had only been there once previously. We had a wonderful time on our honeymoon. It was a great time of intimacy, of relaxation, of reflection, and joy. It was also apparently a productive time...or reproductive time, as the case was.

My men's group had prayed about us having a family quickly. I had shared with my pastor about wanting this very thing. I had cried out to God about wanting children. I am now 40 years old and had been feeling gypped out of having kids and having wasted 14 years of my life for a long time. I have enjoyed loving on my new niece and nephew (Sharon's sister's children) whenever I have been able to do so and had been pretty much already a step daddy to Sharon's son for months before our wedding day. I have been his daily daddy, supporting him, playing with him, teaching him, and doing all the things daddies do for their children even if though he is not my biological son. I have endeavored to treat him as my own son as much as I can within the circumstances I find myself. But those circumstances are for another discussion for another day.

On Sunday afternoon (I am writing on Wednesday night), Sharon was not feeling well. She was extremely sick on Monday, stayed home from work, and went to see a doctor. She was advised to take a pregnancy test as a precaution. On Tuesday, my mother-in-law got on Sharon's case about taking a pregnancy test, since she was certain that she was pregnant and did not just have the flu. Her grandmother thought the same thing and just this weekend swore she was pregnant. To placate her mother, Sharon took a test and it was positive. She took another later on in the day with the same result. I bought a different brand as a control test and she took that one a few hours later. All three tests were positive. After just 51 days of marriage, we may had just found out that we are pregnant.

With that knowledge in hand, we called a local OBGYN practice for an appointment today. The last time I had called seeking information months ago, they said that there was about a one month wait to get an appointment since they were so booked. They got us in this afternoon. Sharon had been sick often during the day and had not been able to keep any food down. Another test in the office proved positive. We were not going to get an ultrasound done, we were told, since they were booked for the whole day. However, just before leaving, they squeezed us in just before the contract ultrasound technician left for the day.

We got to see our baby on the live results screen. He or she is just a tiny little thing, estimated to be 7 weeks, 2 days old according to the size. We have an estimated due date of July 20 of 2009. The incredible thing is that the estimate of 7 weeks or so puts the date of conception right in the first few days of our honeymoon. Our prayers were answered.

I am so very grateful and joyful that I am finally going to have a baby with a wonderful woman that I am proud to call my wife. Thank you, Lord God, for your abundant blessings.

Louisiana had it right, SCOTUS had it wrong, NC getting there

I served on a jury for a trial of a prisoner accused of beating a chomo. Chomos are scum. He got what he deserved, in my opinion, but the assault was also illegal and we had to judge the case as such.

In a 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court of the United States recently struck down a Louisiana law that allows capital punishment for people convicted of raping children. First of all, capital punishment is neither cruel nor unusual, but that was the court's ruling as it is applied to rape cases. They said that the punishment was unfit for the crime. Personally, I find it entirely appropriate.

Here in North Carolina, the governor just signed a bill into law making child rape and molestation offenses carry stiffer punishment. Personally, I think like Louisiana did and believe in the swift, efficient use of the death penalty for chomos. I wish we could do so.

From the WTSB news page:

Governor Signs Jessica Lunsford Act Into Law
On Monday, Gov. Mike Easley signed into law The Jessica Lunsford Act. The law means sexual predators convicted in North Carolina will face stiffer punishment for rape or sexual offenses against children. In certain criminal offenses the minimum sentence will be 25 years in prison followed by lifetime satellite-based monitoring, or the possibility of life imprisonment without parole. The law also increases the criminal penalties for sexual exploitation of a minor and promoting prostitution of a minor, and makes the sex offender registration requirements more stringent. The Act creates a new criminal offense making it unlawful for a sex offender to be on certain premises such as schools, playgrounds and child care centers. Sex offender registries must now be checked, by local school districts, of all school contractual personnel before allowing them to have direct interaction with students. "Today we send a message that North Carolina will protect our children from vicious predators," Easley said. "We will make sure they spend more time in prison and we will track them 24-7 to make sure they never abuse children again." Easley signed the bill in Gaston County, where Jessica Lunsford, the 9-year-old for whom the bill is named, was born and lived until she moved to Florida in 2004. In February 2005 she was raped and murdered by a sex offender. The offender, John Couey, was convicted of her murder and has been sentenced to death. Police had lost track of Couey, who was staying with his sister in the same neighborhood as Jessica. Appearing with the governor at the bill signing was Mark Lunsford, father of Jessica, who has lobbied legislatures around the nation, including North Carolina, for tougher child predator laws. The bill passed the House by a vote of 109-1, and the Senate by a vote of 46-0. The new law goes into effect December 1.

Possible the best animated movie ever

I have already been part of an online message board argument over the premise of the animated movie, "WALL-E", by Pixar/Disney. The premise is that humans made Earth uninhabitable by polluting the world. All people left on a space ship, allegedly for five years, for a clean up operation by automated robots. The robots were to clean up the trash by compacting it into cubes and building piles as high as sky scrapers. Only one such robot remained operational, 700 years later. I simply disagree that we are making the Earth uninhabitable, whereas some others think we have been doing so.

That premise aside, I took my soon to be step-son, John, to see "WALL-E". It was just him and me time and we had a blast. The animated short called "Presto" that opened the movie was just hilarious. It was about a stage magician who failed to feed the rabbit he was supposed to pull out of his hat and the rabbit ruining his act as a result. It was reminiscent of the old Warner Brothers cartoons and I loved it. John and I laughed the whole way through the short.

"WALL-E" itself was perhaps simply the best animated movie I have ever seen. It was witty, cute, charming, and just a lot of fun. The movie had the most imagination used in animation since "Fantasia", I think. I loved "WALL-E" as a family friendly movie that all ages can enjoy. The animation and action was wonderful. I was very impressed.

I am also happy to see that Hollywood has started to get the message that family friendly, clean movies are where the money is. Family type movies almost always make more money than rated R movies do, with few exceptions. There have been several good ones to come along in the past few years, even the past seven months, since I have been in John's life. I have been able to go see "Alvin and the Chipmunks", "Horton Hears a Who", and "Kung Fu Panda" with him and Sharon. "Kung Fu Panda" was great, but Horton sucked. There are several others coming out this fall. We saw previews for others animated movies and saw posters on the theater walls.

Money talks. Parents spend money to take children to the theater. They buy the incredibly expensive snack foods. Parents nowadays seem more willing to lavish such extras on their children than in times past. Me? I just love seeing a good movie with my boy. Movies like "WALL-E" can be enjoyed just as much by adults as by children. I am loving becoming a dad.

Affirmation that I need to start CCW more often

I took the family out to supper this evening at CiCi's Pizza in Smithfield, as we are want to do every so often. It was me, Sharon, John, and Edna (Sharon's mother). We four often dine out together. While there, a tribe of rednecks came in for supper, as well. They were big folks, too. One man had pizza stacked high on his plate, a half dozen slices at least. They had probably a half dozen adults at the tables that were pushed together as well as three elementary school aged children. The three children were at their own table across the aisle.

These three children were little hellions. At least two of them acted as such in the restaurant. They were cutting people in line, running up and down the aisles, and bumping into people. More than once, Edna exclaimed that she wanted to get a hold of a yung'un. We observed this sort of behavior for some time. Finally, two of the hellions were running up and down the aisle near our table and were bumping into Edna some. I finally said something to this child and asked him to please go sit down and not be so rowdy. He immediately went over an whined to his mother. His mother stood up and hollered over to me across a few tables, asking me if I told him to sit down. I said that I did. She chewed me out, saying that I should not be telling her child what to do and to keep out of it. I replied simply, "Uh, no." I felt that someone needed to do something about the unruly children before someone got hurt.

When I said, "Uh, no", a stocky, haggardly looking guy with a Harley Davidson t-shirt immediately stood up and attempted to confront me, asking me to step outside. I just sat there and looked at him acting foolishly. Three of his companions all got in front of him, telling him not to start anything inside the restaurant. He kept hollering at me to step outside. I just sat there quietly, calmly, sipping my lemonade, observing the fray.

The mother came over and attempted to chew me out. Sharon explained to her that her son was being rowdy, was running into people, and that I was not obnoxious or rude to her son. She backed down after Sharon's explanation. The boy apologized and she went back to the crowd, who were all on their feet grumbling and fussing. They eventually filed out into the parking lot. The rednecks all stood around two or three cars for a while and we just sat at our own table talking about what just happened. Discretion being the better part of valor, I allowed the hot headed rednecks simmer down a while and leave.

I have no problem speaking up when it is needed. I have no problem with the idea that once in a while, violence is necessary. I do have a problem with the idea that violence and threats should be a first resort. Small minded people are that way. Sure, the stocky redneck would have done some damage to me, but I would have done a helluva lot to him, as well. The problem was that there were two other adult males and three females in their group. Ergo, I stayed calm and observed for a while.

As she was leaving, one angry woman (certainly not a lady) exclaimed that I was "one lucky man" and then she called me a "son of a bitch". Whatever. If the man, or any of the men at that table were really men, they would have thanked us for bringing the problem to their attention and say that they would handle it. That is what a real man would do. Manhood is not a product of one's physical prowess or one's extremely short fused temper. To be accurate, they were males. One is a man by choice. The lack of maturity was astounding. The example shown to the children explains why they were the way they were.

One thing for certain is that I am going to step up how often I carry my concealed handgun(s) in case some hot head tries anything really stupid.

After having 3 kids 6 and under at the house for 3 days...

My roommate's three grandchildren are all here for several days. Since Sunday night, the three kids, ages 6, 5, and 4 have all been straight out. The 6 and 4 year olds are not the best mannered in the world and can be rude and obnoxious. The grandmother and I have both had to get on their cases. The 5 year old has been better than I thought he would be considering the pack mentality that can arise. This video is how I feel at the moment. OK, I am having fun, but this is what is needed on at least the two.

A few thoughts, trying not to be so depressed

I wrote a while ago about being a big brother/male role model for a tike I have gotten to know. I have gotten to know his mother fairly well, as well. She had some DVDs of video taken at different stages of his life by his grandmother on his father's side. I was watching one yesterday of him at 5 months. He was adorable then, too. But I could not take much of the video, since it was just footage of his parents and grandparents fawning over him, which was boring, but there was a more depressing aspect. Here I am about to turn 40 and I have never had children of my own. I wasted a dozen years of my life being fatherless. Now another one, resolving the marital issues. Even if I remarkably got married the day I got divorced, I would still have to wait another year before even thinking about having a baby, that is if I marry a nubile and fertile woman. I will be 41 by the time my first baby could even come out of the chute. Damn, that is depressing to me.

A great day to be around children

As I blogged earlier, I have been hanging out with a four year old boy lately named John. I met with his mom and him this afternoon. I took the boy to see "Alvin and the Chipmunks" at the theater. He is ALL boy, plays rough, and loves to be physical. He can also be very sweet. On the way to the theater, "Mr. Troy, I love you." He and I have gotten to be good buddies already and we are able to play just as rough as he wants, laugh at farts, make all the funny noises together that boys make for fun, give wedgies, have tickle fights, and laugh a lot.

Earlier in the day, I got to spend some time with my friend, Dave and his wife, who are foster parenting three lovely young girls, ages 2, 4, and 6. I am friends with their mother. We had lunch together at Ryan's Steakhouse. I was loving every minute of it. They seemed to honestly enjoy me, and I did them. I have always wanted a girl and I kept thinking that "I have got to get me one of these!" Each of the girls gave me hugs before we left the restaurant, and I was in kiddie Heaven. My heart has yearned for this all my adult life.

Today was a great day for me, full of joy, laughter, love, and desire to have my own. I am thankful for the opportunities today. Some things have gone so well for me lately, I find myself crying tears of joy, like right now.